22 January 2006

Don't Panic

Turns out my half-serious concern abt. this being the beginning of the end of days was unfounded, as Steve authoritatively informed me the other day that we will not see the end of the world in our lifetime. Whew. Glad he told me that before I confessed my sins and went out to stockpile water, TP, and peanut butter (I think one would need a lot of protein to face apocalypse). Wanna know smthg. really sad? My mom actually did all of that before New Year's Eve 2000 b/c she totally bought into the Y2K bullshit. Not kidding. Every time she came back fr. the store for the last six mos. of 1999 she had gallons of water and canned goods which she stored in this POS shed in our backyard that didn't even adequately protect the boxes and extra furniture we put out there (most of them became mold-ridden or created housing for small mammals and insects), but that my mom felt would be the better shelter option than our brick, solidly-constructed house. Or maybe that was the backup shelter in case smthg. (??) happened to the house. I don't really remember. I was too busy trying not to laugh every time she explained the "emergency plan" to pay attn. I don't think she bought much peanut butter, though, so my plan is already better than hers (haha). When I think abt. my mom doing thgs. like Y2K preparation and my maternal grandmother doing thgs. like hanging all of her coats in the hall closet in a specific order and manner, I say a quick prayer that my dad's genes will be strong enough to fight off what is clearly a genetic tendency toward insanity. Of course, Vern's not totally w/it, either, but that side of the family just has a tendency toward depression and alcoholism, as opposed to the slightly paranoid, OCD-like behavioral oddities of my mom's family.

And now you need never ask again why I do not wish to have children. It's in their best interests, I hope you see. haha...

Eli's first wk. home has been quite nice. Steve has been reasonably well-behaved, Eli hasn't spent an excessive amt. of time watching movies in our room (he's been in the living room instead), and I managed to be reasonably productive despite the many distractions and a mid-week dinner party/drunkfest that left me wondering how I got that drunk that fast on a Tues. evening. Yeah. I didn't do stuff like that in undergrad, I don't know why I did it this wk. as a responsible, mature, post-bac student (hahahaha). Although, in my defense, I must say that I had not intended to get drunk that night. I kept drinking b/c I didn't feel that drunk (obviously a miscalculation on my part), and I was quite surprised when the shots, beers, wine, and margaritas finally hit me and I realized I was totally obliterated. I had told everyone at the beginning of the evening that I had to go work on Physics at 8 and at 830 I stumbled back to my room w/every intention of doing so. At 9 I gave up and went to sleep. I woke up at 530am w/just my shirt on, reached for my alarm (which had not been set, of course), replied to Eli's mumbled query of, "You're not really going to class in the morning, are you?" w/a slight affirmative whine, and went back to sleep. Not only did I go to class in the morning, I was on time for the first time this semester. Apparently drunkenness improves my punctuality. I also nearly passed out fr. vertigo the first time I shifted my head fr. looking at the chalkboard to looking at my notes to looking at the chalkboard, but I overcame. What an Idiot.

There's some other stuff I could talk abt. (like the soldier who came into the ER the other day w/a foreign object lodged up...well, you get it -- he should have driven to Savannah rather than come to the military hospital where everythg. that happens to soldiers must be reported to their company commanders, poor fella's not going to last a wk. when that gets out), but Eli and Steve should be home soon and I suppose I should make it look as if I've done a little more in the last hr. than sit in my bathrobe eating Cheerios. In actuality, I will probably continue to sit in my bathrobe pretending to be working on my Physics lab report while doing little beyond staring at the computer disinterestedly. But that's basically how I made it through grad school, so perhaps smthg. will come of it in the end.

Oh, also, check out this news article that Christy's med school friend had on his blog. It fully illustrates why democracy is not a good idea. http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20060113/od_nm/vampire_dc

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Jules-- are you going to be in town this weekend? Kate says yes. I hope it's true... you and Eli would add so much to the birthday revelry! I would love to come to Savannah with Jenn, also the weekend you mentioned. I think I have something that Sunday, but I could be there on Saturday, maybe. Love you, dear. Tell Eli I'm glad he's home!

Frisboy said...

When I saw the title of your post I thought you were going to make a "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" joke, but no such luck. In any event, I think you should trust your instinct to drink. AFter all, it has gotten me to where I am today.

Alone.

So, so alone.

jules said...

In fact, Daniel, I was thinking more of the Coldplay song when I wrote that title, which perhaps fits nicely w/our mutual decision to follow where the alcohol leads. You may be alone now, but that song teaches us that it cannot be that way forever, even if everythg. is apparently going to shit. Which may explain why we are on speaking terms again at this particular moment -- haha...

And Christy, I WILL be in Chas. this w/e, but Sat. evening is Gary's bday festivities, so I hope you're doing smthg. Fri??? B/C you know neither Eli nor I will be in any condition to drive after a dinner party at Jill and Gary's -- heehee... At any rate, you know I'll be wanting to see you at some point during my visit and I am SO excited that you and Jennifer (and Charlotte if I ever remember to call her) will be coming this way for my bday!! Rockin' the lowcountry...

Frisboy said...

What about Jude the obscure. He was alone forever. And ever.

Here is my favorite quote from the book: "Somebody might have come along that way who would have asked him his trouble... But nobody did come, because nobody does; and under the crushing recognition of his gigantic error Jude continued to wish himself out of the world."

Take that, Dickens!